Seattle Something

who really knows [about me]

A new distraction for a busy twenty-something Seattleite. Think of this as the Seinfeld of blogs.
PLEASE NOTE: The only rule of this blog is that if you know me, do not reveal my true identity. I can do it myself.

Random

Schemin’

Post by Post by The Beast Girl  |  Category: COOL!,Random

Miss me? I’m sure.

Some of you may know, I am gearing up to move (yes, again). To the best of my ability, I intend to make this my last move before any major life changes [enter husband]. No, I do not want to move again because moving sucks balls. However, while I enjoy the convenience of crawling back from the bars, I do not enjoy the thousands of people who live in each of these city blocks. Blah blah blah. You’ve all heard it. I’ve ranted and raved about the city and how much I dislike it. So, I’m moving on. Quite literally.

I gave notice to my landlord two days ago. My grand scheme is as follows:

Comments (0)   |   June 22, 2010 at 6:00

Things that make me nervous

Post by Post by The Beast Girl  |  Category: Random
  1. No chin men.
  2. Pushy corner beggars.
  3. Being a passenger in a car where the driver is hesitant or nervous.
    Those who played soccer with me or have a friend named Melissa know what I’m talking about.
  4. The unexpected wetness on your lower cheek after using a public restroom.
  5. Top comforters of hotel rooms. Wait, extend thought: hotel room beds.
  6. People who are overly sexual. Can’t stop talking about it, can’t stop thinking about it, can’t stop doing it with or without others. Eww.
  7. People with small heads.
  8. Close talkers.
  9. Information on the internet.
  10. Restaurants without booze.
  11. Detached pubic hair.
  12. People who stand too close in lines.
  13. Long finger or toe nails.
  14. Hair in the bathtub / shower.
  15. Weird smells. And by weird I mean, how shall I say, bodily.
  16. People who don’t wash their hands after going to the bathroom. I don’t care if it doesn’t get on your hands. WASH THEM.
  17. Suspected bed bugs.
  18. Food that is chewy or mushy.
  19. The government.
  20. People who wear too much jewelry.
  21. People whose gender is indecipherable.
  22. Cats. They’re unpredictable!
  23. The “lipstick”.
  24. Areola(s?) that are not mine.
  25. People who sign up for online dating but do not post their picture.
Comments (5)   |   June 21, 2010 at 17:25

Secrets, secrets are so fun!

Post by Post by The Beast Girl  |  Category: Random

I found this post on secrets fascinating!

It is unfortunate I know all of you too well to really divulge much of a secret but I’ll do my best:

Sometimes I want to beat my dog. Not like punch her but I mean beat her senseless. Mostly just on those days when I am super tired, just walk in the door from being out for way too many hours, let her out of her kennel and she goes nuts, bat shit nuts, jumping around, running fast and the PLOW. Hits me in the face with her damn paws and her sharp nails because my beast friend Tammy still has my damn nail clippers and I feel like my face will start bleeding. I want to kill her. Instead, I grab her firmly and growl, then I kill her with kindness—the smother snuggle—she HATES it…my way of getting back at her.

There are always great dreams, bad dreams and weird dreams. My favorites are the really bizarre, filled with twisted plots, friends and family members combined in the strangest combinations and persona-morphism (individuals morphing into a totally separate person). However, the weird ones are worst. The ones where men morph to women or visa versa—especially while making out with them. Then you’re just like WTF when you wake up (unless you are really into that sort of thing in real life, “not that there’s anything wrong with that”). Luckily, these are rare!

Money is my number 1 stressor. When money is rolling in and my bills are covered +much savings, I am doing well. When things are tight and I’m concerned about not making ends meet, I am super stressed and possibly a little depressed. Example: the last two weeks I had a planned (fiscally and physically speaking) trip to Mexico, I went on a desperation shopping spree because all of my clothes are crappy and, in the name of business growth, I needed new clothes, THEN my truck’s front tires were making a funny noise and cost me $1100. w00t.

Now it’s your turn. Post something I don’t know about you!

Comments (0)   |   April 26, 2010 at 13:39

Laughed outloud, choked on my laugh, then peed a little

Post by Post by The Beast Girl  |  Category: Random,Really?

Comments (2)   |   April 20, 2010 at 15:31

Ahem. Mmmmmmmmexico!

Post by Post by The Beast Girl  |  Category: COOL!,Random

I am doing my best to keep my ish together. Trying.

Inside? It looks like this:

OOOOHMYEFFINGGOSHHHHHH8*#@)!@(#7531129*(&*(&^!@#(*LQJKJH(*@Q*&@!^#&%R!@*E(W*D!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ve been preppin’ the platter: tanning, waxing and soon, a hair cut! There is nothing like a tan ass and a smooth punket! What?! What?!

My last few weeks have been a lil crazy. I’ve been working hard wrapping up my current projects so that I could spend the next two weeks worry free. From this Tuesday to the next I will be on the shores of Meheeco drinking margaritas. Once I am back, I will be working on my business: redesigning my website, coming up with a marketing strategy, figuring out how I will hire an employee, etc. I don’t really know what I am doing but am exciting to give it a whirl!

So, today marks vacay, day 1.

Comments (1)   |   April 10, 2010 at 17:14
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